Well Kitty has been at school for two weeks now and has adapted very quickly and actually enjoys going every morning, which is such a relief. She is tired by the time she comes home but soon recovers after half an hour of tv, a snack and a drink. Once or twice she has said I missed you today mummy, which I quickly reply, 'I missed you too'. And I do miss her.
Having been at home for thirteen years with my children and working from home for the past couple of years I guess didn't realise how different life would be when all my children headed off to school. I had wonderful plans, still do, but today I am having a little wobble, a crisis of confidence. Perhaps I should look for a part time job to help pass some time, instead of working endlessly on ideas that never quite come to fruition. Also I have to admit it would be lovely to get to the end of each month and know I would have earnt 'x' amount! I love the flexibility of freelancing but hate not knowing how much, if anything, that I will earn each month. At least by combining working part time as an employee and freelancing I would have a regular income.
But then who would employ me! I haven't had a 'proper' job for thirteen years. I also have lost direction a little and wouldn't know what I would want to do, not that there are many part time jobs for mothers. My biggest problem is that I would love to do so many things! I would have been in my final year of a degree in Diagnostic Radiography this year if the university had more space for placement at our local hospital, but they only had space left for hospitals in Cambridge & Peterborough, so I declined my place. I still wonder if I should have pursued a career in Psychology and looked into the graduate conversion course with the Open University to obtain a degree in Pyschology. The other day I flicked through Connors Biology book and wondered if I should do an A level in Biology and apply to train to be a childrens nurse.
I'm not sure where my obsession with the medical profession comes from as I am so clearly an Arts & Humanities girl! Maybe we all have the urge to do something completly different, to change course. Perhaps I am having a mid life crisis a little too young, which is slightly worrying! I'm hoping somebody is now going to tell me this is perfectly normal.
Meanwhile I'll have a cup of tea and ponder a little more.